by Mike McGrann, Executive Director
S. Dale High Center for Family Business
Great business leaders who empower individuals and create honest dialogue in the workplace can create outcomes as successful in the home as they are on the shop floor. So, here are three tips from the business world to better interaction with your teenage child:
1. Great business leaders create an environment of open and honest dialogue in order to build a great team. Give your teens space to have a real voice around the house. I am not speaking of the kind of voice for which we as parents often feel we need earplugs. Rather, do the hard work as a parent to ask three, four or five questions of your kids to ensure that you really understand their perspective on an issue. In doing so, you demonstrate to your child that i) their opinion matters, ii) that you care deeply about them, and iii) they don’t need to shout because they will have a turn to express their needs. Once you demonstrate this to your son or daughter, you have a much better chance of them actually listening to you. Great business leaders understand that they must create an environment of open and honest dialogue if they are going to build a great team. The more your family functions like a team, the more fun it is. While somewhat counter intuitive, the reality is that if you want your child to really listen to you, you must first demonstrate that you are listening to him/her.
2. Great leaders realize that words are cheap, but action is deep. Do as I do, not as I say. Kids, like employees, are always watching the boss. The leader who demands great customer service, but belittles an employee in public has little chance of success. Similarly, the way in you treat your spouse is the model for how your child will treat his or hers someday. The way you treat your child is the way he or she will treat you, and the care you demonstrate for yourself is how your child learns to care for him/herself.
Mike’s Bottom Line: Embrace openness. Be authentic. Be a leader. Connect. Encourage feedback.
S. Dale High Center for Family Business
Great business leaders who empower individuals and create honest dialogue in the workplace can create outcomes as successful in the home as they are on the shop floor. So, here are three tips from the business world to better interaction with your teenage child:
1. Great business leaders create an environment of open and honest dialogue in order to build a great team. Give your teens space to have a real voice around the house. I am not speaking of the kind of voice for which we as parents often feel we need earplugs. Rather, do the hard work as a parent to ask three, four or five questions of your kids to ensure that you really understand their perspective on an issue. In doing so, you demonstrate to your child that i) their opinion matters, ii) that you care deeply about them, and iii) they don’t need to shout because they will have a turn to express their needs. Once you demonstrate this to your son or daughter, you have a much better chance of them actually listening to you. Great business leaders understand that they must create an environment of open and honest dialogue if they are going to build a great team. The more your family functions like a team, the more fun it is. While somewhat counter intuitive, the reality is that if you want your child to really listen to you, you must first demonstrate that you are listening to him/her. 2. Great leaders realize that words are cheap, but action is deep. Do as I do, not as I say. Kids, like employees, are always watching the boss. The leader who demands great customer service, but belittles an employee in public has little chance of success. Similarly, the way in you treat your spouse is the model for how your child will treat his or hers someday. The way you treat your child is the way he or she will treat you, and the care you demonstrate for yourself is how your child learns to care for him/herself.
3. Great business leaders understand that they can treat their subordinates as peers, without fear of losing their place in the hierarchy. Great business leaders often speak of creating “peership” within their hierarchy. By this, they mean that they will seek feedback, ideas, and challenges from anyone in the organization. They want subordinates to tell them why an idea is a good one or bad one. It is in this kind of dialogue that employees feel empowered, engaged and confident. Confident leaders know they can have this kind of dialogue without abdicating their position as the company’s final decision maker. Similarly, the goal with our children should be for them to feel confident that they can share their ideas and challenge their parents in a respectful way… and that their ideas will be respected. This does not mean that their ideas are feasible, but their ideas, their wishes are always welcome. It is said that one of the marks of a great parent is how quickly you can establish a peer-based relationship with your child. You can do so with the confidence that giving children a voice as a peer does not mean abdicating your role as parent.
4. Make time for meetings. Great business leaders make time for their team. Most often this implies regular face to face discussions of tactical issues to ensure alignment and to help the team stay focused on important issues. Similarly, families should make time for regular meetings with parents and children to discuss the issues that are impacting the well-being of the family.
5. Great leaders open themselves to feedback. They understand that only by demonstrating a willingness to grow and change personally, can they expect their company grow and change. This implies an openness to feedback and willingness to reflect on how their actions are impacting the team. Similarly, parents who demonstrate that they are willing to grow and change as parents are more likely to see the changes they wish to see in their children.
Mike’s Bottom Line: Embrace openness. Be authentic. Be a leader. Connect. Encourage feedback.
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